It's All In The Presentation...

Colorado Here I Come -- My Recent Trip to the Centennial State, Part One

2009-10-02T18:07:00.000-07:00

I have made the trip to Denver, Colorado many times in the past. I performed in Aspen, well Snowmass actually, quite frequently in the mid ‘90s and early ‘00’s when the Tower Magic Bar and Restaurant was in business. It was a shame to see that wonderful venue of live magical entertainment close down after over two decades in business. Every time I would be booked there, I would fly into Denver and visit my buddy Ted for a day or so before making the gorgeous drive up to Snowmass for the weekend of performances. I love Denver. I love the downtown area, I love the art culture, and the laid back nature you experience that is so unlike a major city. Compared to the pace of Los Angeles, Denver is like a morgue.

So, two weeks ago I found myself in the Bob Hope Airport in Burbank, CA awaiting my flight to Vegas, where I would then transfer flights and end up, once again, in Denver. This time, however, I was booked in Castle Rock, Colorado – a much shorter drive from Denver – where I was booked for the first time at Joe and Carol Givan’s Theatre of Dreams.

Now, I don’t know how often any of you travel, but I’m sure that if you’ve been in an airport anytime since 9/11, then there has been a chance that your carry-on bag has been opened and searched at one point or another. If not, then you’ve undoubtedly seen that occur to someone else.

I’m a professional magician. I’m that “someone else.” My carry-on is always opened and searched. And who can blame them, really? Magicians tend to carry items that are a bit out of the ordinary from the commonplace traveler. So naturally, on this most recent trip, as I pass through the metal detector waiting for my carry-on containing the bulk of my act to come through the X-ray machine, a female TSA grabs my bag and walks toward me.

“Is this your bag, sir?”

“Yes, it is.”

“I’m going to need to take a look inside.”

“That’s fine,” I reply as I retrieve my briefcase and put my shoes back on.

The scene that followed was very humorous to watch. Her back was to me, blocking my view of the actual case. She pulled out a rubber chicken and placed it aside. Next came a bag of about a dozen sponge balls, two of my “Superman” outfits that I use for the finale of my act, and a beat up looking mayonnaise jar containing a gelatinous blob in it that I use in a card trick that I call “Grandpa’s Brain.” She rooted around in the bag a little more, not bothering to remove anything else, then very carefully and precisely put all the weird curios she had just removed back into the case and closed it up. She turned back to me and handed me the bag.

“Here you go sir, thank you,” she said. “And let me say that this was, by far, the most fun baggage check I have had all year.”

The flight to Las Vegas was brief, as always. From Burbank to Las Vegas, the flight time is just over 30 minutes – 40 at the most. You literally get into the air, the flight attendants take your drink orders, and the pilot comes on the P.A. saying that they are beginning their descent into Vegas before you are served your Coke. The subsequent flight to Denver was a little longer, and uneventful, and I’m always thankful for “uneventful” flights. I fly a lot, and I’m fine with it. I enjoy looking out of the window and taking in the sights as I fly to my destination. So I’m not afraid to fly, but if I let myself dwell too much on the dynamics of it all (IE hurtling at 700 miles an hour through the air, 35,000 feet above some remote mountain range in a very heavy metal tube that has no business being up 35,000 feet in the air – and staying there for hours at a time), well…it can start to get to me.

Ted met me at the Denver airport and we drove back to his apartment. As we drove out of the terminal parking lot on the long stretch of road leading to the freeway, Ted told me to keep an eye out for a particular sculpture that greets drivers as they enter or depart the airport. No sooner had he mentioned this, when I saw the sculpture in question. A giant blue mustang with searing red eyes, rearing up on its hind legs, loomed in the distance. As we drew nearer, Ted told me the history of this piece of art. First, it seems that many Coloradoans (is that the proper term for people who live in Colorado?) are not pleased with the sculpture because at night, the red eyes glow. They can be seen from quite a distance, and it apparently makes the horse look possessed.

Secondly – and even more weirdly – the path this sculpture took to finally end up here in Denver was one fraught with turmoil. In 1993, this sculpture was commissioned by the city of Denver. The job went to a New Mexico artist by the name of Luis Jimenez who worked on it for a few years, but then abandoned the project for some reason – perhaps other more pressing projects. The airport opened in 1995 without the sculpture. According to Ted, the city took Jimenez to court when more time passed and they still didn’t have their sculpture. The city of Denver won the case, and Jimenez went back to work on the piece. One day in 2006, while working on the mustang in his studio, a piece of the unfinished sculpture fell from it’s holdings and killed Jimenez! It had to be finished by Jimenez’s sons, Adan and Orion. The sculpture was installed a little over a year ago, and now people hate it.

You can’t make this stuff up!

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805)480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Help Us Tom Bodett

2009-06-13T10:04:00.000-07:00

I was driving up the coast of California to a series of shows in the Santa Barbara and Santa Ynez area this week. It's a gorgeous drive, and I enjoy it immensely whenever I make a trip in that direction. One moment you're driving along the Pacific Ocean, then, a half-hour later, you're in beautiful wine country.

Just before hitting Santa Barbara, one driving this route will come to a small beach town called Carpinteria (no, not the carpet store...that's Carpeteria). I have driven this way many times in the past and know the area fairly well. There is a very nice looking, and, by all appearances, well-kept Motel 6 right along the freeway. Now, I've never stayed there -- I try not to stay at Motel 6s. Not that I have anything against them; I've used them when the situation arose and it was necessary to get a quick room during a trip, but I just prefer getting a few more frills than a bed, a light bulb, and an aluminum towel rack for the money I spend.

That's why I was shocked to see the price for a room at this particular Motel 6 in Carpinteria displayed in big bold numbers: $99.00!

Really? $99.00 for a Motel 6 room?! When did that happen? And where the hell was Tom Bodett when all of this went down? Tom used to say in their commercials, "We'll leave the light on for you." Well someone has to inform him that Motel 6 has changed their slogan to "We'll leave the meter on for you."

$99.00. Crimony pete!

----
Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Backstage with The Masters of Illusion

2008-12-22T13:57:00.000-08:00

About a month ago I found myself on the lot of Ren-Mar Studios shooting an episode of the new magic television series entitled Masters of Illusion. Ren-Mar is the old Desilu television studios where Desi Arnaz and Lucille Ball really pioneered the current day television sitcom with I Love Lucy. I know that I'll be stepping on a few sacred comedy toes when I say this, but I never really cared for that show. Now, comedy is a big part of my career, and I fully appreciate and respect Lucy for her contribution to the world of comedy and know full well that some of her routines have become, and should be considered, classics.

It was just her incessant whining!

It seems like every time I turned on that show as a kid, and even now, as an adult, when I try to endure an episode, I can't get past her whining and crying to Ricky. She's crying because she can't be in Ricky's show. She's whining because she can't go shopping. Shes sobbing at the outcome of that particular episode's "wacky mix-up" with that inhuman, high-pitched "Wwwhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" thing that just grates my nerves. And I don't think it was all just Lucy. I think that it was her crying coupled with the domineering and controlling nature of Ricky that really turned me off. Lucy cried and Ricky did nothing to get her to shut up! Instead he just continued to exercise that macho and suave Cuban persona that got him into trouble even OUTSIDE of the show's plot lines. I understand it was a different time then, and that it was a "man's world." This was what allowed Ricky to strut around unchecked, oozing his Cubanness in public and over the airwaves exciting American women into a frenzy causing them all to want to get a hold of his maracas. No one questioned that he was out thumping other women's bongos in real life behind Lucy's back. It was almost EXPECTED of him. Men did these things out in the open then.

And, so, because of his arrogance and her whining, I prefer to appreciate Lucy's comedy through isolated clips of her classically funny routines.

So where was I?

Oh yes! So I was at Ren-Mar Studios in Los Angeles shooting Masters of Illusion. This is a 13-week series consisting of different magicians presenting different styles of magic in each episode. The show is supposed to debut on January 5th on Fox's MyNetworkTV, and I was lucky enough to be included in the 6-day shooting schedule, as were a lot of my performing friends.

By the time my shoot day rolled around, it was Thursday of that week, and by this time the producers and crew members had had three days to understand how they wanted the whole production to roll that day. We all had our production assistants, and mine, Ryan, was very helpful in getting me whatever it was that I needed.

We all had a dress rehearsal on stage for the production crew and the director. Mine was at about noon. Because my performance clothes were in the wardrobe department being pressed and my shoes were being shined (thank you, Ryan), I walked through my 10-minute set in my street clothes. A crew member stood in for the volunteers that I would have up on the stage during the actual shoot that night in front of a live audience. I ran through the two routines I would be performing later that evening, and had the crew laughing st my antics, even though they were somewhat downplayed for the rehearsal. My big finale, when I disrobe to reveal my Superman-style outfit with the chosen card emblazoned on my chest, was reduced to me holding up the costume on a wooden hanger and announcing to the unseen director, "...And I end up wearing THIS."

The director's voiced boomed down, as if from Heaven, "That's great, Shawn. There's just one thing I'm going to ask that you do tonight."

"What's that?"

"Because we haven't cleared the rights to your music, I'm going to ask that you don't talk over the music when it's playing tonight."

I should explain for those of you who have never seen my act. The finish to my show is a routine I call "Magicman" where I attempt to find a volunteer's selected card over and over again. My attempts to locate the card become more and more extravagant and more and more strange with each card I find. None of them are the selected card, however. Finally, music from the movie Superman begins to play and I disrobe, in the style of Superman, to reveal the correct card on my chest. It's kind of like what it would look like when Superman, himself, switched from Clark Kent into his crime-fighting alter ego if you were allowed in the phone booth while he changed. Except for the fact that Clark Kent is in a LOT better shape than I am.

From what I've heard from other performers with music who participated in the Masters shoot, NONE of our music had been cleared and all of us will have substitute pieces playing -- pieces that the production DOES have the rights to -- in the final edited version of the show. This is a fairly common practice, and it didn't bother me at all. I mean it would have been GREAT if MY music played during my segment, but a comparably dramatic piece will do. The reason I had been asked not to speak during the music was because they will have to remove the track with my music to substitute their own, and if I had been talking during that time, my voice would disappear with the music, and home viewers would see my lips moving, but nothing would be coming out. Actually not MUCH different from my EVERYDAY life, now that I think about it...

Anyway, once my rehearsal was over, I had the rest of the day to just prepare for my evening performance, write, watch some of the other rehearsals, and wander the studio. I decided to pack up some of the props that I wouldn't be needing that night and load them into my car so I would have less to clean up after my evening performance. As I walked across the studio to the lot where I parked my car, I walked by a very attractive woman who, I could tell by her provocative style of dress, was probably shooting something in the studio across from ours. She was engaged in conversation with a director or producer or manager or something, and as I got closer, we made eye contact briefly. As I passed, my mind raced to place her face. Was that Britney Spears? I walked out the front gate of the studio and made a left to walk down the street to my car. Holy Crap! There was a line of about 100 teens and young adults lined up outside the studio.

Yep, it was Brit, all right, and this group was here to be a part of her new M-TV video that they were shooting in the studio across the way.

Our audience was let into the studio at about 6:30 PM, and we all began to prepare for the shoot. We got our performance order and we went to make-up. As we drew nearer to the beginning of the evening's show, Ryan appeared and informed me that the sound department would like to talk with me. It seemed that they were trying to decide on how to wire me up with a microphone so that I could be heard during my entire routine. Remember now, I was going to be taking off my clothes during my performance, and I have one more line to say to the volunteer after I'm left standing in my "Superman" costume. It was that ONE LINE, and how to mike me for it, that was giving the sound department headaches. They could give me one mike, but if they attached it to my coat, my coat will then be shed, and I would have no mike for the final line once I was in my costume. If they attached the mike to the COSTUME, the next question was where to hide the transmitter. It couldn't be put into my jacket, because, again, the jacket will be coming off, and we don't want the transmitter just hanging there. And even then, if they attached the mike to the costume, it would have to be under my outer layer of clothing for most of my act, and that would make for unsatisfactory sound quality. We discussed various options, and I was excused while they thought about it.

I was called back to the sound department many times, and each time we all found it more and more humorous, because every time I went there, they would have a great idea, and as we discussed each idea, we would realize that it wouldn't work after all, and I would be excused again. Finally, a resolution was discovered. I would be fitted with TWO microphones. One on my outer layer of clothing, and one underneath attached to my costume. When my jacket came off, the first mike would be discarded with it and when I was standing there in my spandex outfit, the second mike would already be there ready to take over. Problem solved.

Now came the hilariously awkward process of wiring me up while standing in the spandex outfit. Thank God no one was backstage with a camera, because the last thing I need is a video popping up on YouTube showing me with my pants down around my ankles while two very muscular and beefy men shoved a transmitter encased in a makeshift pouch of Grip's tape into my red Speedo underwear and ran a small microphone wire through a popped stitch in my costume located precariously close to me bum, up my back and over my shoulder to be clipped on the collar of my spandex costume. An odd looking scene to the random passerby, to be sure.

When this particular episode airs, look for the transmitter sticking out of my butt.

Masters of Illusion was a great experience, and I was very happy to be a part of it. The entire production staff made my 12-hour day there very comfortable and all of the producers made a point of telling me how much they enjoyed my set.

Some other memorable moments that happened backstage:

+ David Williamson, one of the funniest comedy magicians out there, watching escape artist Mark Cannon onstage from the video screen backstage with a very "concerned" look on his face while Mark attempted to escape his restraints before a bed of knives plummeted down on him. Williamson stood there with his arms crossed, intently watching the screen. As soon as Mark's first hand was freed after much struggling, Williamson's expression changed to one of relief as he said, "Oh good! He's going to be all right! He'll be fine." He looked at me and said in an accusatory tone, "YOU wanted to see the spikes drop, didn't you!"

+ Magician and funny man Dave Cox walking down the ramp backstage leading from the performing area to the crew area, and, wearing patent leather shoes, slipping and going down right on his butt. I thought, witnessing the fall and heading over to see if he needed help, that he might be seriously hurt. He was fine and was able to perform his funny Evil Hypnotist Monkey routine that night.

+ Illusionist Nathan Burton's dance team being seriously fooled by a "lead choreographer with the production" (really an imposter played by an associate of David Williamson's) that wanted to go over all the girls' dance moves and disapproving of much of it.

+ Spirited conversation with my friends Jonathan Levit, Johnny Ace Palmer, and Bruce Gold, all three of them great magicians and a part of the series, during dinner before the evening show.

Great memories, lots of fun, and we got to shoot a TV show together. Is this a great job, or what?

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
(805) 990-0600
www.conjuredupcreations.com

M-U-M Was the Word

2008-09-30T11:11:00.001-07:00

I visited Louisville, KY this past July. I attended a gigantic magicians’ convention in the city of baseball bats, bourbon, and fried chicken, but not all of it was a pleasure trip. I was also interviewed by a committee who was looking for a new editor-in-chief for M-U-M Magazine. M-U-M stands for “Magic, Unity, Might” which is the motto for The Society of American Magicians (SAM), and M-U-M is the organ for the society; reporting not only on what is happening within the magic world, but within the organization itself. The SAM is the world’s oldest magic society, founded in 1902, with Harry Houdini being one of their past national presidents. The current editor of the magazine decided to retire after three years, and the society was looking for someone to take the reigns. Having just left the position of associate editor of MAGIC Magazine, I decided to apply for the M-U-M position.

Hence, the trip to Louisville.

I met with the committee and had a very good interview. I didn’t tell many people about this whole process while it was in the works, and it was in the works for a long time. It began back in late May when the thought initially entered my mind. Was this something I wanted to do? Could I run an entire magazine? How would I balance this responsibility with the rest of my magic career? The more I thought about it the more I realized that, yes, this was something I DID want to pursue and something that I would be good at. I could make it work.

So began the whirlwind of preparation that consumed the next three months of my life. Making travel arrangements, putting together five copies of a portfolio consisting of my past writing and editing work, completing a resume, preparing for the interview, participating in a follow-up interview over the phone in August by a committee member who had not made the Louisville trip, and then, ultimately, waiting for the committee’s decision. And oh, did I wait. I waited and waited. I waited well beyond the time-frame that I had initially been told the committee would be making a decision. When I contacted someone from the committee just to check in and to see how things were progressing, I was told that they were “nearing a decision.” This delayed decision started to become a problem, as I had put a number of projects of my own on hold and didn’t commit to anything new with associates or clients. Other performers who I have worked with in the past would question me about my availability and I would have to give them vague answers and temporary commitments without really explaining why. And, if you've followed this blog, you've no doubt noticed that I haven't been posting as frequently as I have in the past.

Well, the call finally came in about three weeks ago. I was told that I had been one of the top three finalists, and was actually considered “number two” of the three, but the job went to another applicant. That applicant is a very good magician and a wonderful writer named Michael Close. He will be the official editor for M-U-M as of January 1, 2009. Since the announcement has been made, I have also heard that the SAM is cutting back on the budget of their magazine and that Michael will be going in at a disadvantage that the current editor never had to face. It will be very interesting to see how Michael handles the budget and staff cuts. As someone who almost had the position, I have to say that it was probably for the best that I DIDN’T get it after all.

So, my secret’s out. Thanks for bearing with me and putting up with the lack of posts over the past few months. If you are a fellow performer who has been trying to contact me or “pin me down” on something, I apologize. Things are back to normal now, and I intend on continuing at an even greater force than before this all began.

Shawn

Shawn McMaster

Conjured-Up Creations

P.O. Box 973

Newbury Park, CA 91319

(805) 480-0703

www.conjuredupcreations.com

Waiting for George in Connecticut

2008-04-25T08:01:00.000-07:00

It's 11:00 AM and I'm sitting in Bradley Airport in Hartford, CT awaiting my flight. It's still an hour and a half away before we take off, but I've been here since 9:30 AM and it's all thanks to George W.

You see, for some reason our illustrious leader has decided to come to Hartford -- to this very airport -- and therefore, I had to beat the roadblocks. I woke up at 7:00 with the intent of taking my time to finish up some last minute packing, grab a bite to eat, return my rental car and stroll leisurely to my gate.

Then I switched on the TV.

The local news breaks in between the Today show announced that "rolling roadblocks" would be taking place after 10:30 near the airport. "Rolling roadblocks?" Holy crap! So much for the leisurely trip to the airport. You know that if they're stating 10:30 as the beginning of these roadblocks, they're actually going to be preparing for them at around 9:30, and there will be good ol' Shawn sitting in bumper to bumper traffic swearing at George Bush...more than usual.

I made it here without incident, had some breakfast at Einstein's Bagels, read a little, and now here I am sitting in the corner of my gate's boarding area. The faint sound of Drew Carey giving something away on The Price is Right lilts over from the far corner as members of some athletic team from the University of Connecticut -- mostly female, it seems -- start to fill the seats.

Still no sign of George, though...

I flew here from San Diego after a gig on a private yacht for the Toshiba company. that show went great, but I was kept so busy between the strolling close-up magic I performed during the cocktail hour and then the stage show after dinner, that by the time I finished packing up my show and eating my dinner, the cruise through the beautiful San Diego Harbor was over. Oh well. More time to go back and hit the bar at the resort we were all staying at.

HOLD ON! Was that Laura?!

No, false alarm. It wasn't Laura Bush. Besides, she'd have a mass of Secret Service guys around her, wouldn't she? The lady I saw was only carrying a Shih tzu.

From San Diego, I hopped a flight to Hartford in preparation for my appearance at the University of Hartford.

Gads, what a show that was...

You know, when members of your audience are passing around and drinking from a plastic pitcher of beer, you know it's going to be an interesting evening. I bill my stage act as "the magic & mayhem of Shawn McMaster," but I gotta tell you that they had plenty of mayhem going before I showed up on the scene. The show was wild, and though I had a really good time, it was a much different type of show than I am accustomed to presenting. I found myself constantly adjusting what it was that I was doing so as to keep the audience with me. I was successful, but I definitely earned my check, as it was a lot of work. The finale of my stage act, for those who haven't seen it, involve me taking off my clothes and ending up in a Superman-style outfit. Last night at the university show, as I turned my back to begin disrobing, the audience started chanting -- CHANTING -- "Take it off! Take it off!" They were a wild audience, and we got along splendidly.

Wait a minute, there's a crowd of people coming! I swear that's George!

Nope...my mistake. As the crowd got closer, I realized it was just a couple of special needs kids traveling with their teachers and parents. That was the closest we've come, though, since I've been here.

Well, it's about time to board so I need to finish this post. Besides, an elderly couple have just sat down beside me and the woman is slightly hard of hearing and is yelling at her husband to "speak up or speak more clearly!" It's hard to concentrate and I need to beat the University of Connecticut athletic team onto the plane.

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Celebracadabra!

2008-04-16T13:42:00.000-07:00

Those of you reading this who are not magicians probably aren’t aware of the growing anticipation over an upcoming new magic reality series entitled, I am not kidding you here, Celebracadabra that will be debuting just under two weeks from now on April 27th on VH-1. Since word of this series first broke, speculation within the magic community about the show has been more varied and wide-ranging than Oprah Winfrey’s dress sizes. The biggest question among magicians has been, “Will it be good for magic?” With all the various “magic exposure” shows that have hit the networks over the last decade (IE The Masked Magician), magicians have understandably become a bit gun-shy about a reality show that will be teaching magic to celebrities to be performed in a competition format. I wrote about the show in the March issue of MAGIC Magazine and at the time I wasn’t allowed to reveal who the celebrities were that would be participating. Since then VH-1 has released the names, so I think I’m pretty safe here in telling you who they are. The seven stars – a mixture of both actors and singers – include Hal Sparks, Ant, Kimberly Wyatt, C. Thomas Howell, Carnie Wilson, Chris Kid Reid, and Lisa Ann Walter. They each get paired up with a “magic coach,” a professional magician whose job it is to teach his celeb a trick or routine that fits each week’s challenge. I know most of the magician coaches in the show, but two of them are good friends of mine. Actually, to be clear, one coach and the host of the show are friends of mine.

David Regal is a very funny close-up and parlor magician with a razor sharp wit. Not only is he a well-respected performer, he is also a fantastic writer of both magic texts and television shows. He has written for shows such as Everybody Loves Raymond and The Wild Thornberrys. Watch for him.

The host of the show is one of my close friends Jonathan Levit. I have known Jonathan for a good number of years and have had the pleasure of performing with him on a number of occasions. Jonathan not only hosts the nine week series, but he is also one of the judges that decides who stays and who goes each week.

So, the anticipation over this show was relieved a couple of weeks ago when I received an advance copy of the first episode of Celebracadabra in the mail. First, let me start by saying I HATE reality TV. HATE it! Not fond of it at all. Not a big fan. Dislike it greatly. And episode one of Celebracadabra did nothing to change that, but I will say this. I was very happy to see how the teaching and overall performance of the magic was approached. It was not just taught in a haphazard, off-the-cuff manner like in past episodes of the horrible Circus of the Stars shows. Instead, the magic was treated like the art form that it is. The celebrities were shown failing some of the tricks, and practicing harder to get them right the next time. I have heard from people close to the production, that the stars really got a sense of what it takes to be a professional magician and, in some cases, gained a new respect for the art.

As I’ve said, Celebracadabra did nothing to change my opinion of reality shows – even when said reality show’s subject matter is something near and dear to me – but it certainly wasn’t the worst one I’ve seen. Plus, I’ve only seen one show to date, and I always give a new TV show a bit of leniency for the first episode or two before I pass a final judgment on it and decide whether I will continue to tune in. The first show kept my attention and I had only a few minor problems with it. More advance episodes are on their way, so we’ll see how things progress. In the meantime, I think you might find this show interesting. Check your local listings for times in your area. Celebracadabra premiering April 27th on VH-1. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the show.

Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

A Former Napoleon Dynamite Meets Napoleon Dynamite

2008-02-19T10:34:00.000-08:00

There is a point in my act where I share my real life senior portrait with my audience. It is my actual high school picture and the joke comes at a time when I am talking about the fact that I turned down getting braces on my teeth because I was afraid of not “looking good” for my senior portrait. It’s at this point when I say to the audience, “Allow me to share with you my senior picture,” and I pull out this hideous photo of me from that era. My hair was permed at the time, I’m wearing glasses that automatically turned dark with the sun, a suit that looks to be made out of powder blue cardboard with a wild patterned shirt, and – if you look really close – you can make out just the hint of what is the beginning of a cheesy moustache. The saddest part of this is I actually walked the streets looking like that at one point in my life, and now it’s one of the biggest laughs in my act. The audience never fails to respond with waves of delighted laughter, prompting me to follow-up with the line, “Thank you all for your caring and compassion, I appreciate that.” I then put the picture away, saying, "But I digress...I'm not hear to regale you with tales from the days when I looked like Napoleon Dynamite..." and continue on with my act.

With that said, I’d like to relay something that happened to me during my recent week performing at the Magic Castle in Hollywood. This was on a Saturday night, which means I had been delivering that joke up to three times a night since Monday of that week. I had just finished my last show for the evening and now took a seat in the showroom to watch my friend Jonathan Levit begin his first of three shows for the evening. I happened to sit next to a man who had been to the club earlier in the week on Thursday. He mentioned to me how much he had enjoyed my act and that he had brought other guests in to see me, and that they had just been in my last show. I thanked him for the kind words regarding my performance, and then he asked me an unusual question.

“Did you know who was in your audience on that last show?”

I told him I had no idea. He then said, “Jon Heder was in the audience. He’s one of my guests tonight. He saw the show and thought you were very funny. He loved the Napoleon Dynamite joke.”

My brain was trying to comprehend what he was saying. For those of you who have never seen the movie Napoleon Dynamite, Jon Heder plays the lead character, and the film’s namesake, and I swear to you, the character looks exactly like I looked back then – and I have a senior picture to prove it!

“Jon was in the audience?” I repeated as a question, still not sure I was understanding him correctly.

“Yeah,” the guy says and points to his left. I lean forward to look where he’s pointing and, leaning forward about four people away looking back at me and waving, is Jon Heder. Well, I couldn’t help it. I just started laughing. I was laughing at the absurdity of it all, and at the chances of this even happening. The absurdity that I looked like this character twenty years before the film was even thought of, that the picture of me gets as big a laugh as it does, that a movie was made that features a character that looks so much like I did then, and that the lead actor who played that role would wind up in one of my audiences looking and laughing at the picture. The whole thing just seemed so surreal.

After my friend’s show ended, Jon and I talked, and I told him how funny I thought the whole thing was. He agreed and, again, complemented me on my show. A friend of his asked me if I had delivered that joke because I knew he was in the audience, and I assured them that I had no idea he was in the audience as the lights are very bright when performing in that showroom. I told them that I had been doing this joke for many years and it was not said solely on his behalf. It was, and has been said for all this time, because I truly looked like Napoleon Dynamite.

They had to agree, and, quite frankly, I’m not sure if that’s a compliment…

Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Resolutions or Goals?

2008-01-20T15:05:00.000-08:00

Now that the craziness of the holidays is behind us, we can now look ahead to the year in front of us. I’ve never been one to make resolutions as I find the whole process rather pointless. Being self-employed you tend to, and must, set goals for yourself if you’re going to succeed. The thing is these goals are constantly adjusted throughout the year and that is why I find resolutions so fruitless. The difference between resolutions and goals is that the hapless resolution-maker becomes frustrated at the first sign of his or her new “resolution” straying even slightly from its original desired outcome. Red flags are immediately raised and they quit in a flood of discouragement.

The experienced goal-setter, on the other hand, recognizes that the path to the final destination is not a perfectly paved, flower-lined route. Rather, it quite often is a winding mountain road with sheer drop-offs, blind curves, and the ever-present threat of falling rocks. The key is to set realistic goals for yourself with the knowledge that readjustments in attaining those goals will certainly be needed. This will lessen your frustration level and make the desired result that much more satisfying once it is attained.

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster

Conjured-Up Creations

P.O. Box 973

Newbury Park, CA 91319

(805) 480-0703

www.conjuredupcreations.com

Walking Through the Town of Insurance

2007-11-02T16:26:00.000-07:00

As I write this it's almost 7:30 pm on Friday evening in Hartford, CT. I'm here on business performing at a conference at the Hartford Convention Center in the heart of downtown Hartford. This is actually my first visit to this city and I gotta say it's very picturesque this time of year. Chilly breezes blowing off of the Connecticut River (which is around the corner from my hotel) that kick up the various colored fall leaves around my feet.

Being in the middle of downtown, I walk everywhere I need to go. Restaurants, the post office, the convention center itself. This morning before one of my scheduled performances, I decided to go get breakfast at one of the cafes I had remembered seeing after arriving in town yesterday. I had taken the initiative to check the weather for Hartford before leaving Southern California, and saw that it was going to be cold. The highs here have been in the low '50s. Not too terribly cold, but with the wind, it feels much colder. In preparing for the walk of several blocks to the restaurant, I thought that the sweater I was wearing with my jeans would probably be sufficient enough to keep me warm. the only jacket I had brought was my heavy leather jacket. Putting that on over my sweater, I thought, would be too hot.

Boy was I wrong...

I should have worn the jacket as the breeze kicked up and blew right through my previously "thick enough" sweater. To make matters worse, the restaurant wasn't where I thought it was and the walk took longer than anticipated, and me farther from my hotel, until I was just about prepared to walk into the next unlocked door I came to -- be it a restaurant, Andy Gump, or Church of Scientology just to get out of the friggin' cold.

Yesterday afternoon, with my trusty iPod clipped to my belt, I took a walk along the bank of the river and came across a plaque on the support of a bridge that I was walking under. The plaque was commemorating the three biggest floods in Hartford history by showing the three different water levels of each flood. I believe the highest one was thirty-six feet. "Holy Crap," I thought standing there and looking up at the water level mark. I looked at the trees and the buildings that were nearby thinking that all of these would have been wiped out. It was unbelievable. And two of these floods were within two years of each other in the 1930s. I think that that is when you start to really consider moving. Instead of moving, however, they built a dyke after the second flood.

Three big floods in Hartford's history. No wonder this town is known for it's insurance...

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

In Search of Red Underwear

2007-09-15T17:19:00.000-07:00

There is a routine that I perform in my act that involves me taking off my clothes onstage and standing in a Superman-type outfit. It's a powder blue unitard with a pair of red bikini briefs worn on the outside to round out the look. The time came recently for me to replace the costume, and I was eager to make some changes to my original design. The unitard still worked well, but the neckline had to be changed. On the original, the outfit had a small collar that would sometimes be seen before it was supposed to be. Granted, to the audience it would just appear as if I was wearing an undershirt, but the point was I didn't want it seen at all until the climactic moment of my act. The new costume I had made corrected that problem with the absence of a collar.

Along with the new costume I had to buy a new pair of red bikini briefs. Considering that I had to have special silk screened graphics put on the front of the specially ordered unitards I had just acquired, I thought that obtaining a new pair of briefs would be the least difficult part of my costume-replacing task.

I had no idea what I was up against...

First, purchasing an individual pair of briefs these days is out of the question. You can only find bikini briefs in packages ranging from the Walmart , Macy's, or JC Penney's packages of three on up to the Costco packages of ninety-two. I was not opposed to buying packages of three as long as at least one of the briefs was my desired color. What I found instead was a wide array of briefs in colors other than a simple red. You would think that red would be incredibly easy to find, wouldn't you?

No.

Instead I found briefs in Alizarin, Amaranth, Cardinal, Carmine, Cerise, Chestnut, Dark Pink, Fuchsia, Magenta, Maroon, Mauve taupe, Persimmon, Rust, Puce, Sangria, Terra cotta, and Vermilion.

Crimony, people! Can I JUST have a RED pair of underwear?! It shouldn't be that difficult!

Not only did I find every shade of red -- other than JUST red -- imaginable, I also came across a number of different wild patterns featured on these briefs that make me wonder just what is going on in the bedrooms of this country...and how I can learn more about it?! I saw more leopard spots than I think there are leopards left in the world. What exactly is it about the nature of the bikini brief that lends itself to leopard spots and other lascivious designs? In the underwear family it seems as if the brief is the lecherous "devil-may-care" pervert with flames originating from the "action area" and flickering upward toward the waistband, while the boxer comes off as the prudish and dull puritan who will be seen in nothing but paisley or dull earth tones. The wildest the boxer will willingly become -- when it is throwing all caution to the wind -- is polka dots or bottles of Tabasco Sauce.

One other drawback in my search was the actual search itself. I can't remember a time in my life when I've looked at more men's crotches in such a short period of time. If there was one, I'm sure I've blocked it out of my mind!

Finally, in the very back of a row in the men's department of my fourth Walmart in one day, there sat a package of underwear that had one solid red pair of briefs in it, and I now wear them proudly. Not just as the humorous ending of my act, but -- more importantly -- as the symbol of my triumph!

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

America's Got Talent, but not on "America's Got Talent"

2007-08-18T22:09:00.000-07:00

At the risk of offending fans of the show, I have to state right here and now how much I hate America’s Got Talent. I hate reality shows in general, but I think I hate this one with more of a passion because I’m forced to watch it. This is not one of those “guilty pleasure” things – I really AM forced to watch it. I write for a magic magazine, and magicians are on that show all the time. Therefore, I’m forced to sit through an agonizing 60 minutes – sometimes 90 if it’s a “special episode” – watching and keeping tabs on the magic men and women who appear and what they perform so I can report it for the magazine. I am, quite often, given inside information on what is about to happen on the show from sources I’m not at liberty to divulge, but, STILL, I have to watch the episodes to confirm all this information and to report anything else my sources may NOT have told me. Some of the magicians who have appeared in the past have been friends of mine, and yet I’m still praying for their early elimination so that my pain can end sooner.

With the exception of these magician friends, America’s Got Talent, for the most part, is a showcase of untalented people being judged by even less talented celebrities. I auditioned at one of the preliminary auditions for the first season of the show – before I knew what the show was all about – and thank God I wasn’t chosen. After the first season aired, I realized that my act wasn’t right for what they were looking for, and I’m glad they thought so too. I was spared the degradation of someone like David Hasselhoff telling me what he thought of the act that I have been making a living with for the last 15 years! No thanks. I don’t need Knight Rider and Jerry Springer critiquing my performances.

A perfect example is what happened to my friend Kevin James on the most recent season of AGT. Kevin is a very talented magician who has had his own show in Las Vegas for the last four years. He has performed all over the world and presents magic that no one else does. He invents all of his own tricks and is admired by his peers. On AGT he stunned the judges with his unique version of cutting someone in two. Stunned them. They were literally speechless. And when you take into consideration that one of the judges, Piers Morgan, can be pretty indifferent, and even rude, to most of what he sees, that’s saying something.

Well, due to time constraints in a later episode, Kevin was faced with performing a portion of one of his routines so that it fit into the show’s 70-second slot requirement. Therefore, it wasn’t as impressive to the judges as his past effects had been. Piers just tore into him, and even exposed the trick Kevin had just performed! It was totally uncalled for and entirely unprofessional.

In talking with Kevin after the fact, he explained that he was given the chance to reply to Piers’ tirade, which he did in a professional manner – resisting the temptation to tear into the guy, and explained how his style of magic was different from other magicians as he creates everything on his own. “It’s like the singers on this show writing all their own songs every week,” is what he told the audience and television cameras. None of his remarks were aired. Kevin even said that he talked with the producers of the show asking them to at least edit out the part where Piers exposed the trick. A trick that he performs for thousands of people every week in Las Vegas. No such luck. Kevin said he would have been satisfied if they had left in Piers’ conniption fir and didn’t air his comments as long as they edited out the trick’s exposure. Instead they did just the opposite.

Thanks, America’s Got Talent. Thanks for filling our airwaves with more mindless drivel that you try to pass off as talent, while the truly talented are mocked and trivialized.

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
805-480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Old-Fashioned Freeze in a High-Tech World

2007-07-19T21:15:00.000-07:00

So I'm craving Foster's ice cream earlier today. I'm driving around doing errands and keeping appointments, and I decide to go through the drive-thru at the Foster's Old-Fashioned Freeze near my home. Okay, technically it's my local El Pollo Loco. It's just that it has recently become one of those weird hybrid fast food places that combine two completely unrelated fast food chains together in a mass plot to kill the customer faster with twice as much unhealthy food. And the combinations never make sense to me. I mean a chicken joint that sells ice cream sundaes? Carl's Jr. and Green Burrito? What is happening? And what's next on the horizon? Arby's and Panda Express? Subway and Spudnuts? Starbucks and Albertson's grocery store? Wait a minute...

Anyway, I pull up to the menu board and prepare myself. You never know how this type of exchange is going to go in the first place. The speaker might be all crackly, the person on the other end might not hear me correctly and screw up my order -- although how hard can it be? I'm just ordering a small dipped cone. And on top of it, I remember as I'm pulling up to the sign to order that this location has been known to not have the capability of dipping my cone in chocolate from time to time, for whatever reason. I've never really asked why they can dip the cones some days and can't on others.

"Can I help you," is what I think came out of the speaker.

"Yes. do you have chocolate dipped cones?"

"I'm sorry?" the speaker squawks.

"Do you have chocolate dipped cones," I try again.

"You want a cone? A small one?"

"Well, yes...do you have chocolate dipped cones?"

"You want another one? Two?"

I'm beginning to debate whether the ice cream is really worth it.

"No," I answer, "just one small one."

"Okay drive to the window," comes my response.

Against my better judgement, I drive to the window and stop. The lady pops her head out of the window and says, "The ice cream is too soft for the cones right now. Would you like it in a cup instead?"

Isn't the ice cream at Foster's supposed to be soft? Wouldn't Foster's ice cream that is too soft for cones be Vanilla Soup? Well, at this point what are my options, really? There's a line of cars behind me, and I have ordered the ice cream. It's practically worth finishing what I started just to see what's handed to me.

"Sure," I say. "Put it in a cup."

She leaves to carry out this task, and, to her credit, I notice that she is putting the chocolate shell that she would have normally dipped the cone into over the top of the ice cream. But as I watch her doing this, another employee that has been standing by the window during this whole exchange leans toward me with a small plastic bag. As I take it from her, I see that it contains -- I kid you not -- a few napkins a spoon and an empty sugar cone!

I drove away eating my ice cream with a spoon while the cone that it was supposed to be in sat next to me, empty, on the passenger seat.

Okay...whatever. You guys do what it is you need to do. At least I got my ice cream.

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Living the SLO Life

2007-06-29T13:19:00.000-07:00

I'm in San Luis Obispo, CA. I've spent the last three days up here performing, and I gotta say that every time I'm here I discover something new. I perform here about once a year, and every time I come back I realize just how much I love it here. The weather's nice and the people are very friendly, laid back, and interesting. They have a great morning jazz program on the local NPR station that I listen to while driving downtown sipping my coffee. Hell, even their mortuary looks inviting. Not that most mortuaries are gloomy places -- unless you have business there, of course -- and I know that the idea of a mortuary is to make the experience as comfortable as possible by being decorated in a homey manner, but SLO's mortuary actually looks happy...if that's possible. Brightly colored flowers and a cheery architectural style makes it almost look like a place you would want to go to and hang out in!

And you know something else I like about SLO? Their one-way streets are easy to navigate. Believe me, that's important for someone who spends as much time in a car as I do. Take Denver, CO for example. I love that town, but their one-way streets can suck. I don't know how many times I've driven past the same guy sleeping on a park bench during one of my visits to Denver. You know you're in a hopeless situation when a schizophrenic, homeless man who sleeps on a bench and wears his entire wardrobe all at once while pushing his worldly possessions around in a rickety Kings Grocery shopping cart begins to look at you with a critical eye and begins questioning your mentality.

But I digress. I love it here in SLO because of the atmosphere. It's the home to Cal Poly, so it's a town bustling with students and artistic people of all ages. Which, I guess, accounts for most of the laid back attitude. And the party atmosphere. The place really does come alive here at night. And again, not just with the students, but everybody. Walking down Higuera Street at 10:00 at night I pass young people out to dance, drink, and have a good time, a middle-aged couple laving an expensive restaurant and stepping into a quiet pub open to the sidewalk for a nightcap, and a lone gentleman picking on a banjo outside of a Coldstone ice cream store collecting coins from passersby.

Places like this just seem to inspire me all the more. A very art-conscious and spiritual community filled with accepting, friendly people.

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Angel Sighting

2007-05-13T17:16:00.000-07:00

A couple of months ago, I wrote about my thoughts on David Blaine. I am constantly asked what I think of both he and Criss Angel, and in March I wrote about what I thought of Blaine. At that time I promised to write about Angel in the near future. Let’s do that now.

Geez, where do I begin…

Well, let’s start with an observation from a comedian friend of mine, John Bizarre. If you haven’t seen this man perform, you need to. He travels the world performing both for comedy club audiences, and, quite often, for our troops overseas. He’s a non-stop whirlwind of energy when he’s onstage. Hands down one of my top five favorite comics working today – and he’s in the top three of those. He also writes very passionately when he’s riffing on a topic. He had the opportunity recently to see an episode of Criss Angel’s Mindfreak show while on a plane. He felt compelled to write me about it. Here’s what he had to say:

By the way, I saw the Criss Angel show on the plane yesterday coming back from Erie. I wanted to get up and punch the TV. He is all style over substance, and that style sucks. He's like a flashy guitar player in a BigHair band that throws his arms around and jumps all over the stage, but only knows three chords.

Yes, Criss does tend to come off that way. And for the most part, I agree with John’s point on “style over substance.” It seems that the young magicians today are drawn to the quick, flashy, “MTV” style of performance. And, really, who can blame them in these attention-deficit times? It’s all they know. They are the TV generation. Actually, they’re not even the TV generation. They’re more along the lines of the Internet generation. Instant information in small, continuous bite-sized pieces. Mindfreak does have an avant-garde style to it, and I tend to like avant-garde. But when it gets in the way of the “meat” of what’s being offered, then there’s a problem. Criss’ show tends to suffer from this very problem. Don’t get me wrong. Some of the magic that he performs is solid stuff, and some of it I like. It’s when he gets into the “stunts” that I tend to lose interest. And I have the same problem with David Blaine.

Less endurance stunts, and more magic please. Endurance stunts aren't magic.

And did you hear that Criss has signed on with the Cirque du Soleil people to produce a magic show for the Luxor in Vegas slated to premiere in 2008? It will be interesting to see how he makes the transition from television to the live stage...

--Shawn

Fear and Loathing in New York

2007-04-28T05:50:00.000-07:00

New York City -- Saturday Morning

The skyline of New York greets me through my open window presenting itself draped in sunlight and a cool nip in the air. It's gorgeous, and I'm glad to be here -- now that I finally made it!

You would not believe what it took to get here. I can't even believe what it took to get here.

My flight out of the Bob Hope Airport in Burbank, CA was scheduled for 10:55 AM. I was flying Jet Blue. Up to this point, my only knowledge of Jet Blue was that it was the airline that got its front wheels stuck and was televised on every news channel as viewers waited for it to land and watch the wheels snap right off -- as every news analyst predicted. The pilot of that plane showed everybody up by making an expert landing and everyone on board exited unharmed. If that pilot didn't get a promotion, or at least a raise -- he was robbed. So...having never flown Jet Blue in the past, I figured I was in good hands. And to be perfectly honest, most of this wasn't Jet Blue's fault. It's just a shame that I have to associate their airline with this trip.

Upon my arrival at the Bob Hope airport I was immediately hit with a sign on the boarding pass machine informing me that my flight to JFK Airport would be delayed until 12:30 PM. All right, fine. I have work I can do on my laptop while I wait. I proceed through security. My bags get held up. My bags always get held up. I'm a magician. My case doesn't contain the normal stuff that most cases carry. And then I always get the slow and confused head upturn from the contents of the case to my face with a look of, "Could you please explain all the nonsense I see here in your carry-on?"

I finally get to my gate and work on the computer until our boarding time. Once on board, our captain informs us that our non-stop flight to New York would be making a stop in Salt Lake City, Utah. The reason was to re-fuel for safety's sake seeing as how JFK had to delay our flight due to heavy air traffic and weather. I'm still not sure I understand that, but I'm all for anything to keep me safe while I'm hurtling 590 MPH in a metal tube 35,000 feet above the ground! The bad part of it was that this meant we would be delayed even longer in getting to New York. We were originally supposed to be landing at 7:10 PM EST. Now, God only knew when we'd be touching down.

I hadn't eaten any real food all day, and during this flight I still didn't eat any real food. Nuts, cookies, and Doritos Cheesy Crunchy Mix (I don't even know if that's the right name for the concoction that awaited me when I opened the bag) made up my in-flight diet. Thank God for the bottled water and coffee. And apparently they didn't get extra rolls of toilet paper in Salt Lake when they gassed up, because toward the end of the flight each of the three lavatories had run out.

We finally land at JFK at 10:30 PM. After getting my bag, I grab a taxi to the Belvedere Hotel on 48th Street, where I'll be staying. Do I even have to mention the cab ride? It was expensive and too damned fast. I mean, I'm all for getting me to my destination quickly, but quickly and alive is what I prefer.

I arrive at the Belvedere at approximately 11:25 PM. About three hours later than I should have been there. I'm tired, I'm starving, and I want to unload my stuff in my room and get something to eat. I give my name to Julio at the front desk...and he can't find my name. He is on the phone with Hotels.com for, I'm not exaggerating here, 40 minutes until they were finally able to give him information pertaining to the room. Julio was very accommodating during the entire process. It was Hotels.com who dropped the ball.

By the time I had dropped off my bags, checked messages and e-mails that had come to me while I was in the air, and finally sitting in an all-night cafe eating a pastrami sandwich, it was 1:00 AM.

I really have been looking forward to this trip. Lots of good work will be coning out of it. Let's just hope the rest of the trip goes better than my first day.

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

The Magic Castle of the North

2007-04-21T15:07:00.000-07:00

It's Saturday afternoon and I'm sitting in my hotel room in Martinez, California. For those of you who have never been to Martinez, it really is a lovely place. Downtown Martinez is quaint and very in tune with their past history. The environmentalist John Muir is almost revered here as there is everything from hotels to auto repair shops named after him. His actual home, now a historical landmark, sits right across the street from where I'm staying. The reason I'm here, of course, is to perform. And the place I'm currently performing in is California Magic.

California Magic is a theatre that has just celebrated its third anniversary and seems to be growing stronger as the months go by. You can visit their website and get an idea of what the place looks like and is all about by going to www.calmagic.com. But let me just tell you, the place is great! It's a wonderful venue for live entertainment and has gained the reputation among magicians as the best place to perform next to the Magic Castle in Hollywood. And Gerry and Laura Griffin -- the owners of the place -- are always gracious hosts and are always making sure you have everything you need. I have a good friend who owned and operated a comedy club for 8 1/2 years. He is also a performing comedian. All of the comics that worked his club went out of their way to tell him how much they enjoyed performing there because he knew the performers' mentality. It was great, they consistently told him, that a performing comic was running the club rather than a business man disconnected from the stand-up comedy scene who was only in it to make a buck. My friend treated them differently because he was one of them and kept their needs in mind. Gerry and Laura are exactly the same. They know the needs of the performers who work their theatre (Gerry is a performing magician himself) and they go out of their way to make them feel comfortable.

Last night's show was great. It was a smaller crowd (the first slow night they've had in many months, Laura told me), but their responses to my show made up for the size. They were really receptive and I had a great time performing for them. And the thing is, I wasn't even supposed to BE HERE this week. I had just finished working the theatre in February and was booked for a return visit in September. However, last week Gerry called me and asked if I might be able to fill in for Woody Pittman, also a comedy magician, who had to cancel suddenly to go to Europe. Well, I was home preparing for a trip to New York the week following the week that Gerry needed me, so why not? I only had to bump a couple of minor meetings, and I was on my way.

The drive to Martinez, actually any drive north in California, is a beautiful one. First the beaches and the ocean which then give way to wine country. Nice and relaxing. It gives me time to listen to music and think through my show, possibly working on new ideas that can be included. And then once you arrive here and take in the scenery, well it just makes for a wonderful visit. And if the audiences are good -- which they usually are here -- so much the better. The difference between the audiences at places like California Magic and the Magic Castle and audiences in, say, a comedy club -- which I perform in from time to time -- is that the audience in a comedy club isn't necessarily interested in magic. It takes a skilled performer to grab their interest quick and make them enjoy what you have to offer. At the Magic Castle, and especially at California Magic, the audiences are here for one thing...Magic. Okay, maybe two things -- dinner and magic. The pressure is off in these situations. Granted, you still have to be a skilled performer and offer an enjoyable show, but you don't have to convince them to watch the magic. That's what they've come here for. They are always instantly accepting. And the dinner at California Magic -- which is included in the ticket price -- is superb. It' such a refreshing change to eat good food when you're on the road, and I look forward to hanging out after the show, dining with the Griffins and their staff. It's a good time.

Well, have to go and prepare for tonight's performance, which I'm told is close to sold-out capacity.

Until next time,

Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805) 480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

The Oscars of Magic

2007-04-08T23:55:00.000-07:00

This past weekend (April 7th) was the "Academy Awards" of the magic industry. Held at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, it is a black tie gala with a lot of celebrities both from the magic community and television and motion pictures. The event awards excellence in magic chosen from the many acts that appear yearly at the Magic Castle with the winners being voted on by the membership -- much like the Oscars. I had intended to go and had purchased tickets to the occasion months ago. It was only a few weeks ago that my editor at MAGIC Magazine found out that I was going and talked me into covering the event and writing one thousand or so words that could serve as a two page spread in our upcoming issue.

I realized that I would have to take my tux out of the closet. A tux that I hadn't used in a couple of years. Knowing full well that I had gained a few pounds over these last few years, I saved my self the indignity of trying it on, and just went straight to a men's clothing store to rent a tuxedo. I was going to rent a tuxedo! I don't think I've done that since my high school prom!

Two days before the big night, I pick up the tux and try it on. It's at that moment that I notice the coat has tails. Tails?! Did I order tails? And if I had, was I sober at the time? In thinking back to the picture in the book from which I had originally ordered the garment, I recalled admiring the way the coat "cut away" in the front on the model that was wearing my tux of choice. But that was the problem. I had only seen the jacket from the front. And nowhere in the book had I seen anything saying that the coat had tails.

Bottom line: Yes I had ordered the coat with tails, and yes, I had been sober.

I try on the whole shebang, and as the sales associate pulls the coat off the hanger to help me slip it on, he remarks,"Tails? I haven't seen anyone wear tails in a long time."

You know what, man? You're not helping.

"But," he continues before I actually have a chance to verbally reply, "it looks good on you."

I gaze at myself in the three-way mirror, and realize he's right. I look damned good.

The evening itself was a lot of fun. The awards show has had its ups and downs, accurately reflective of whatever current state The Magic Castle had found itself in in any given year. Currently, the Castle is enjoying a resurgence of popularity, as has the entire art of magic, and many A-list celebrity types are either becoming members or are happy to attend the awards ceremony as a presenter, of both. Steve Martin was present at this year's ceremony presenting two awards, as was Seinfeld's Jason Alexander. Both have been members of the Castle for many years, and Jason actually performed a magic act to sold-out crowds at the Castle this past year and killed the week he was there.

Jason did such a great job the week he was booked there that he ended up being nominated as one of the five finalists for Parlour Magician of the Year. And he took it! Jason Alexander won the award this past weekend, and can now add "Parlour Magician of the Year for 2006" on his already impressive resume.

One other great moment of the evening was when a very funny and talented magician whom I've admired for years, Mike Caveney, finally won Stage Magician of the Year. The reason I say "finally" is that every time he's appeared at the Castle -- in any capacity whatsoever be it lecturing or performing onstage or in the Parlour -- he has always been nominated. And he has always lost. He has been nominated 23 times, and has lost all 23 times. The running joke was that Mike was the "Susan Lucci of magic." But even Susan Lucci won an Emmy after 19 nominations! Mike finally won the award this weekend and accepted it to a standing ovation, which he richly deserved.

It was a great night. I finished the story about the ceremony for the magazine today and sent that off, and now I think I need to sign off here. Gotta return my tux tomorrow!

--Shawn

Shawn McMaster
Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
(805)480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

The Coney Island Wonder Worker

2007-03-24T16:58:00.000-07:00

I had never met Todd Robbins before. Our communications had only been limited to just a few e-mail messages back and forth over the span of a couple of years. Literally a total of about seven or eight messages over approximately five years. And even then it was only to confirm some detail about a story that I was working on for my then electronic magic publication The Mandala or for MAGIC Magazine. We never really got to know one another any more than our scant electronic communications afforded us.

That was until two weeks ago when we finally met face to face at The Magic Castle in Hollywood. He and I had been booked to work the same week in the same room -- The Parlour of Prestidigitation. I was the early performer in that room, and he the late. Todd lives in New York and works Coney Island daily. He is very instrumental out there in keeping an American tradition alive -- namely the Side Show. Todd eats light bulbs, walks on broken bottles, sticks his hands into real animal traps, and blows up hot water bottles until they burst.

Basically, he's a freak. But one of the most charming freaks you'll ever meet. And one that I'm glad to say that I got to know a little better and now consider a friend.

Very nattily dressed in a jacket and vest with a watch chain, he endears his audiences with his comedic banter and then proceeds to invade their sense of good taste by biting into and chewing a real GE 75 watt light bulb or by hammering a nail into his nose.

This is exactly the same act that got him banned at The Magic Castle over 15 years ago when the Castle was booked by a different entertainment director that labeled Todd's act as "disgusting." Thanks to the foresight of the new entertainment director there, Todd's act was brought back and a new generation of audiences were able to witness something truly wonderful.

I know, you're thinking, "How could an act where a man chews glass and sticks things into his sinus cavities be termed 'wonderful?'" Let me assure you that it is. I saw his show five times that week, and enjoyed it each time. When Todd inquired why I was seeing it so many times, I had to explain to him that I felt his show was one of those shows that you want to see over and over again with somebody new each time. You just have to see their reaction and watch them experience the same feeling you felt the first time you saw it. Every night that week when I had guests in the club that had come to see my show, I took them to see Todd, saying, "I'm not going to tell you what he does...you just have to see it."

And so, I say the same to you. If you ever get the chance to see Todd Robbins, you just have to see him.

Shawn McMaster

Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
805-480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

The Bain of Blaine?

2007-03-11T21:47:00.000-07:00

One of the most common questions I get from people when they find out that I’m a professional magician is, “What do you think of David Blaine or Criss Angel?”

When David Blaine first hit the scene, there was a lot of animosity toward him within the magic community. And while it has lessened to a certain degree, some of it still lingers even today. For the most part, that malevolence is due to the fact that the magic Blaine performs, at least the magic he performed early on in his career, was not very technical and most of what he did took very little skill to accomplish. The hard-core sleight of hand guys were quick to point out his lack of polish and amateurish-looking performances.

But you know what? The home audiences loved it!

This is proven by the fact that Blaine has become the performer he is now, and by the fact that his first ABC special received very high ratings. Blaine’s idol is Harry Houdini – a man who has been dead for over 80 years, and yet people still talk about him. Houdini made a name for himself by performing all sorts of stunts – mostly escapes – and his motto was it didn’t matter what kind of publicity you got, just as long as they spelled your name correctly. And while that may not be the best approach at establishing your name and reputation, there’s something to be said for that level of tenacity. I have heard that the way Blaine secured his ABC deal was he just went out into the street and performed some tricks for strangers passing by while his friend video taped it. He then finagled a meeting with an ABC executive, showed him the tape, levitated in his office, and said, “That’s what I do.” The rest is history, and I think David is well on his way to gaining the type of fame Houdini has enjoyed.

The magicians that gave David flack then – as well as now – could, quite possibly, be jealous of his success. What they are not realizing is that David Blaine single-handedly brought close-up magic to a much wider audience than it had ever enjoyed up to that point. Until David Blaine, most people only thought of stage magicians and big boxy tricks when they thought of magic. Very few people had ever been exposed to magic up close, or in an intimate setting. Thanks to David Blaine the art of close-up magic has begun to receive the respect it deserves, and many close-up magicians are getting more work.

So what about Criss Angel? I'll have to talk about that next time. It's a lot more involved.

Shawn McMaster

Conjured-Up Creations
P.O. Box 973
Newbury Park, CA 91319
805-480-0703
www.conjuredupcreations.com

Flight Plans & Mortality

2006-03-28T01:10:00.000-08:00

I just recently returned from a business trip to Las Vegas. What a nightmare. Not the actual business that occurred in Vegas--that actually went well. It was the getting to and from Las Vegas that was the chore.

I like flying out of Burbank (now known as the Bob Hope Airport...which is actually a misnomer as, in this case, it really gave me no HOPE at all...) because it seems there are just less problems flying out of there. Well, as we were lining up to board our airplane, it was announced that all patrons in Terminal A (MY terminal) must leave the building to be re-screened because of a security breach. Now I understand that security procedures are tight, and anything that will make MY flight safer...so be it. But COME ON! we were just about to board our plane for pete's sake. We were in line to board. Literally 30 seconds away. Needless to say, I landed in Vegas over an hour after I was supposed to be there.

Then there was the flight home. I was at the Vegas airport in plenty of time to catch my flight, it's just that my flight was canceled. CANCELED! We were all informed that we would be put on another flight that would take us to LAX, then we would be shuttled free of charge to the Burbank (Oh, I'm sorry...the BOB HOPE) airport. The whole reason I fly out of Burbank is so I don't have to deal with LAX, and now, I had no choice. Again, I didn't get home until WAY after my scheduled time.

---------------

I received some incredibly sad news today. A local magician from my area, and a pretty good friend passed away over the weekend. His name was Chris DePalma. He was a professional magican like me, and a very generous guy with his time. Many times in the past, I had consulted Chris to get his advice on various business matters, and he would always take the time to discuss my situation and possible solutions. Chris was a great guy and won't be forgotten.

Normal Life?

2005-09-20T17:41:00.000-07:00

I'm 42. I'm a professional magician, writer, and speaker, and I'm publishing my thoughts for all the world to see.

Vanity? Maybe.

Therapy? Most definitely.

The truth is I don't lead a normal life. I don't know many entertainers who do. And until the recent advent of "blogs" as a way to bare your soul to an annonymous listener, performers that I know of, me included, had to pay therapists for this priveledge. Now we can do it for free.

Hmmm..."bearing your soul for free to an annonymous listener". That description could be about either a blog or Confession, couldn't it? I guess a blog is a confession of sorts.

Either way I intend on using this as a cathartic, creative way of looking at my life and, at the same time giving any interested readers an inside look into what it's like to be doing what I'm doing.

I guess what I'm saying is I'll examine myself, and anyone who is interested can watch me. C'mon! It'll be fun!!